." Let me finish," Steve said. "As I said, I was jealous... jealous that Shirley might turn you into some sort of effeminate house-husband--you know, like some of the other guys. That hasn't happened--at least, not yet. You sometimes look lost in thought, and we all know you are thinking of her, but you're still the same guy. It's quite obvious that you're happy. I've never seen you this way before and I'm happy for you. I just wish that I could find a chick like Shirley..." Shirley is NOT a 'chick, '" I said, almost automatically."Sorry, Jim," Steve said, looking a bit sheepish. "I was just trying to say..."Once again, I interrupted my friend. "I understand what you mean, Steve. Shirley is really special." This was getting uncomfortable for me. "Here, let's set up the table."The rest of the guys came over, and the awkward moment passed.During the game, my thoughts naturally drifted back to Shirley every so often. I decided that she and Wendy left early, which is why Shirley wrote in. Most of the bottom-land bitches what wear fancy store-bought undies trap their men-folks by sticking they who-zit and they nasty heinies right under they noses until they pop the question. The women-folk on the mountain wait till a special day each year to track down and snare us a nice poke-stick to share in a soft bed when the moon is shining just right.The last few months, I been tending the hillside corn squeeze still for the family since Billy Bob is off shooting communists. We got lots more of the stuff now since he ain't around to do all his "sampling" of the moonshine. I go to do the sampling now but make sure I chew up a little cornbread to keep from getting bamboozled. I let that squirrelly Sampson McGee get me cross-eyed with some polluted punch at the last school dance and he got all rambunctious with my personal female goodies before I could land a good one on him. I guess that's about as close as I ever got to "taking it" with a fella. Thank goodness he was so tipsy all.
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